Nine days to go. And then? I can’t say that I haven’t thought about the end. Just like anyone who sets and achieves a goal. Then what? It’s difficult for me to say (or think) that I will never have another glass of wine and that wasn’t my intention at the start of this.
If I do allow myself to drink in the future, it would be on social occasions only. And with my tendency toward solitude, those events happen about 3 times a year. It will never again be the daily, weekly, monthly, Friday night with the crew or all-by-myself pastime. I don’t want the habit. Period.
What is not at all difficult for me to say and what I do know with absolute certainty is that I choose to continue doing just what I’ve been doing for the last 91 days. I love this newfound freedom and clarity. I never want to be enslaved again.
And 100 days will not be enough.
Grateful to be sober. Thanks be to God.
Without the whine 
Well done on your day count Elizabeth. I’m so pleased that you have found freedom in sobriety.
I know I can never drink normally – I spent too long trying to do it.
I will be thinking of you on 100 days. It’s so wonderful to achieve the targets we set ourselves (I never managed this before sobriety 🙂
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Elizabeth. Very nice progress. I’m glad that you are aware of the freedom and the clarity. Love your courage and strength. But if you are anything like me, you can’t even have one drink on a special or rare social occasion. My alcoholism lies to me. It tells me I can control myself. I can drink like a normal person. My disease tells me I can have just one or two. But here’s the truth: ONE will never be enough. And two would lead to three. The daily drinking and enslavement would return quickly. It’s always worse, never better. Remember that. Don’t think in terms of a 100 day goal or a one year goal or the forever goal of the rest of your life. Keep it real simple. Just stay sober TODAY. And tomorrow….do it again. One day at a time.
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Thank you soberthought for your kind words and sound advice.
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I’m going over this blog to see just where and when ‘it’ started. Thank you for advice that fell on deaf ears.
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I think the most important thing I have learned this time around, as you just said, it that it is my choice. In the past, I’ve blamed circumstances and friends and stress, but now I know it is up to me. I do like having the power over alcohol, but I am no longer under the illusion that I could moderate. I have friends who can, even after years of sobriety, but I don’t think I’m one of them. And that’s OK.
Congratulations on 100 days!
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Thank you Shawna!
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You must be at 100 days now?
Way to go!!
I know I can’t moderate, as I have to watch other things like shopping.
But I am okay not drinking!
xo
wendy
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Thanks Wendy-actually I’m at 98 today. I have been around “the crew” Friday nights and Saturdays the past couple of weeks due to a temporary change in my work schedule and I had not one iota of a desire to join in. Way back when, even after 9 years sobriety, I still struggled with cravings. So grateful for this miracle. I also need to watch my spending! 😉
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