After I had moved back to my home state, I realized very quickly that I would not be able to do enough massage to sustain me.
I saw an ad in the paper (this was 1999) for a vitamin buyer (I had been into health for years) so I called. Yes, this was before Monster.com and Indeed.com.
I have never had to find a job online. These days are different. Going through that now.
Help. (gulp) (double gulp)
My strong point has always been my handshake and eye contact.
So before I get off again, let me continue.
I had no idea how long the drive was to the natural food store where I was to meet with the manager… until I made it. I was going that way for a Dr.s appointment anyway but kept telling myself- “This is too long a drive, forget it.”
Somehow, I kept feeling that I needed to at least go in to meet with him. I argued back and forth with myself but that small, still voice won out.
I went in for the interview. He had just taken over the position of manager.
I was his first hire.
He was a Jew-Bu (a jewish buddhist) who had recently been through a conversion of his own.
He had received Christ as the Messiah.
Without going through all the details of our friendship which would take 1000 pages to fill, I can say that this man has been a living saint. Not just to me…I have witnessed his presence to others.
When I went through my divorce 6 years ago and had a couple of stints on the psych ward, I was so ashamed. Probably because my dad was always ending up there and my identification with him led me to incredible despair.
He never was able to stay sober.
This man, this living angel brought me groceries for probably 3 months. He gave me money. He continued to call me and visit me when, I think honestly, I would have given up- I was in bad shape.
We have known and loved each other for all these years…in a brotherly and sisterly way, although he even offered to marry me at one point to take care of me.
But something had changed deep within me when my husband and I divorced. And I felt this man deserved a full and mutually satisfying love relationship in every sense.
For me, it would have been for all the wrong reasons. I can’t speak for him.
For me, my issues of the past (and other markers He has left for me) just lead me to believe that I am His alone.
I have prayed for years that he meet someone who is as Godly as him…
and he has.
We’ve often talked of growing old together and taking care of one another.
So this is very hard.
There is the selfish part of me that is not happy at all…
I am also overjoyed for my friend.
Because she sounds just like him….
An angel walking this earth.
Glad to be figuring this out sober.
Thanks be to God.