Ramblings @ 9 Months…

Don’t expect much here.

Why’s it I have so much to say in my head and the minute I sit down here, it’s all gone?  It’s been about 6 weeks and I’ve got 5 or 6 post titles saved with a few lines in each but haven’t been able to complete even a one.

I think it’s March Madness.  My own.  Nothing to do with basketball.

It’s always the worst month for me mentally and emotionally.  Weather weary.  Wardrobe weary.  Tired of the black and grey.   Brighter colors attract attention and I’d rather not be noticed.

I’m yearning to stay in but anxious to move out.  At odds with myself.

I always feel like I’m hatching in the spring.  Most times I don’t really want to. Just leave me be.  To ramble away…..

Nine months of sobriety feels like a lifetime- in a very good way.  I’m still in awe of the fact that sobriety has become who I am.

I am sober.

I don’t drink.

I don’t even think about it.

It’s no longer even a part of my thought process.  Strange…  it’s almost like alcohol was never a part of my life.  Even on the bad days.  And seriously, there’s been more than a few of them.

Makes me a little suspicious actually.

What hasn’t felt so good is the growth.  I guess it never does.  At least while it’s happening.  The rewards of perseverance come later.  Sometimes much later.

But I trust they will because I trust in the One who began His work in me.  He will not leave me unfinished.

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”  Philippians 1:6

By His grace and mercy @ 9 months, 3/20/18

 

 

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Author: Elizabeth

Living a life of unceasing prayer in gratitude to Him who saved me.

18 thoughts on “Ramblings @ 9 Months…”

  1. Congratulations on nine months! It’s a lifetime.
    I’m like you — antsy, unsettled. I haven’t been at home, which hasn’t helped, because the weather here is starting to get warmer. We’ve been up north for more overcast winter weather. But Spring is just around the corner! I hold out for that.
    I feel like I need to plan a trip, or something else to look forward to. I almost bought a huge map of England this weekend, just to hang it on the wall as a possibility. (I’ve never been there.) So what’s lacking for me right now is inspiration. That’ll be my prayer request … inspiration!
    I’m so glad we’re still in the “AF” club together. Who knew? 💕

    Liked by 1 person

      1. OK, that I will! You’re right — hanging the map will ensure that it happens. For as much as I believe in this vision boarding, I don’t actually carry through. My vision boards are stuck in the closet. A map is much more doable. I think it would be cool to do a Jane Austen tour. I’m sure somebody out there is doing it. ; )

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Anne. I agree- the extra sunlight is so good but still waiting for the warmer air here. Nor’easter #4 bearing down tonight and tomorrow! UGH. Maybe a good time to catch up on my fellow blogger’s – as long as we don’t lose power! Great to hear from you!

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    1. Woo Hoo is right! Thanks Wendy. Let’s hope this is the last of the snow! Sorry I haven’t been on your blog lately- I’ve had an aversion to my computer for the past month. Thank you for always stopping by! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I am so happy for you Elizabeth. It is such a great feeling when alcohol no longer consumes your every thought. I feel as though the old me, the alcoholic me, was such a long time ago that it doesn’t even warrant a mention. But it wasn’t that long ago and I can’t allow myself to forget because the memories of those dark days.
    Life is a funny thing. I have been on a spiritual journey for a long time. You are part of that journey. If it were not for ‘meeting’ you here in Soberville I probably would never have sought out more information about the Catholic Faith. But something about you made me want to hear more. Even in the midst of your own turmoil you radiated grace and I found that compelling. Last night I celebrated my confirmation in to the Catholic Church. In Two days I celebrate 17 months of Sobriety. The two go hand in hand. I would not have found this new expression of faith if it were not for the dark side of addiction. And for that I am grateful. Grateful that I met a woman named Elizabeth from many miles across the ocean. Grateful that she shared her faith with me at a time in my life where there was little hope of recovery. Grateful that she is walking in freedom from addiction.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You know how much I write…right? Well, despite everything I DO finish, there are a ton of things I don’t. I had 65 drafts the last time I looked (on my phone it doesn’t give me the amount). I try not to delete anything to quickly because my thoughts are usually my memories too. Please keep writing, even if it is just for you. Support’s important, even when you think you don’t need it. Love to you x

    Liked by 1 person

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