I had my first drink at 12. It was also my first drunk. I had 9 years sober at 40. I’ve been at it again…now for 21 years. Now I am not a stumbling, mumbling, falling down drunk (at least not for the last 21 years) but I was graced with a tremendous tolerance for alcohol. A gift from my father. And I don’t have a stop button that works consistently or reliably. With this said I tend to consume far more wine, beer or whatever is being poured than is good or healthy for me. I don’t have hangovers but what I do have are incongruities all over the place. Because alcohol is a parasite on my soul. It diminishes every aspect of my life: physical, emotional, mental, spiritual, psychological, relational and financial. I’m sure I could name a few more without too much thought. But the most disturbing way I have witnessed this parasite in action is in my relationship with my Lord. Simply put, as long as I continue to drink the way I do, alcohol is my master.

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other.” Matthew 6:24

Unattended, this parasite on my soul will prevent me from ever fully becoming who my Lord created me to be. And I am way more concerned with that notion than with what it could do to my health. May sound strange but it’s the truth.

SO… Today is day 6 of the 100 Day Sober Challenge I signed on for. I have found the strength to start. I need courage to remain . I  will welcome who He created me to be.  He is by my side. Without Him I can do nothing. Thank you Belle.

2 thoughts on “About”

  1. I have been thinking about this a lot – my relationship with the Lord and my relationship with wine. Due to my physiological makeup I am prone to drink until drunk. I am not your average alcoholic in that all I crave is wine so maybe I am a wineaholic :). Whatever you call it I know that it is affecting many areas of my life. I know that the Lord loves me sober or drunk, and I know I will enter the gates of heaven whether I am sober or drunk because of my faith in Jesus Christ. BUT – what about here? You mentioned the Lord as though you are a child of God through Jesus which is why I am babbling on… If I have assumed incorrectly please set me straight and I won’t pursue conversation on this subject anymore. However, I am truly interested to discuss this with Christians. I have been wondering, myself, how much of my wine idolatry is affecting my blessings? I know y salvation is dependent on nothing but Jesus, but the bible speaks of rewards in heaven based on works, and the Old Testament speaks on blessings for obedience. It just makes since that if we obey God and trust God (no idols) that we would receive an outpouring of blessing. I don’t know – still mulling it over and trying to find specifics regarding such in the bible. I have just starting reading your blog and relating to a lot of it. I have only been drinking wine and over drinking consistently for about 6 years. Of those 6 years my longest stretch without was 32 days. I am now on my umpteenth attempt to quit and on day 14. Thank you for sharing your story, and I look forward to reading your entries.


    1. Hi mooseylou, thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. Yes, you are correct in your assumptions of me. Jesus is my savior. He has without a shred of doubt saved me from many people, situations and most of all myself. I was and still can be my biggest danger. His Blessings in this life don’t always jive with what most of us consider blessings- mostly in the material sense. What I have come to believe is that my life is a gift from God meant for blessing and serving others for His glory. I have squandered this gift in so many ways-in time, talent and treasure. The blessings I have received are peace, joy, love and a release from lifelong depression. The release from wine and other alcohol has come very recently as I’m sure you’ve read here. He is faithful. I will also look forward to following your journey. Good for you on 14 days! Keep going.

      Liked by 4 people

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